Hypocrite Carrie Prejean Topless & Other Gay News

Christian right-wing crazy Carrie Prejean, who alleges she lost the Miss USA contest because she spoke against gay marriage, is a fake-tittied hypocrite. After losing the contest, she immediately became a mouthpiece for the National Organization For Marriage, appearing in their commercials, going on the road, etc. This week, topless photos she took while trying to become a Victoria's Secret panty model have surfaced. I'm sure in the Bible it says that young women should not flash their surgery enhanced ta-tas for monetary gain or thou shalt go straight to hell. Prejean's response: "I'm a Christian and a model." Uh-huh. What you really are Carrie Prejean is an opportunist, a bigot, a hypocrite and a fucking liar. Expect the National Ogres For Marriage to run like hell from Carrie and for her to be stripped of her Miss California title. I'm sure Hustler and Juggs will be calling Carrie soon. If you want to see Carrie's dirty pillows (hat tip to Margaret White, who would have sent this Carrie straight to the prayer closet) you can see them at The Dirty.com blog.

Perhaps Carrie should hook up with crackhead/tax evader Marion Barry. You remember Marion, don't you? He's the disgraced ex-mayor of Washington D.C., who somehow got re-elected to the D.C. City Council. He said there would be "civil war" if the council voted to recognize gay marriages from other states. Yesterday, Barry voted yes, but then called for a revote because he didn't understand what he was voting for. Ummm...is Marion still on the cheap stuff? Crack is whack, Marion, crack is whack. 

Hey, Marion and Carrie should make it a threesome with Samuel Wurzelbacher, better known as homophobic, hypocritical, opportunist "Joe the Plumber." This week, Joe said gay people were "queers" and pedophiles. He, of course, has gay friends, but he wouldn't let them near his children. Joe the Loser also said gays "use God as a punchline." No, darling, we use your crazy ass as a punchline. Someone load this fuckwit into a rocket and shoot him into the center of the sun. Maybe we should start a Facebook petition and take up a collection. I'd pay extra if we can squeeze Carrie and Marion in there with him.

While these morons are babbling, human and civil rights continue to advance. In more uplifting news, Maine approved gay marriage today and the governor signed it into law less than an hour later. Then, New Hampshire legislators approved a gay marriage bill and sent it to the governor's desk for his signature. However, Gov. John Lynch has spoken against marriage and may not sign the bill. Come on, John, do the right thing! 

Comments

Anonymous said…
Collin - so angry - you need to breathe!
Collin Kelley said…
Oh, Sean, how sweet of you to be concerned.
minus five said…
as a lifelong hater of the words "tit" and "titty" and "tittied," i'd like to say that "fake-tittied hypocrite" is one of the best and funniest phrases i've heard in a long time. i don't know that i could bring myself to say it, but it was funny to read it.
Collin Kelley said…
Go ahead, MF, give it a try -- let it roll of your tongue. :)
Kate Evans said…
This was the funniest and most astute summaries of the events of the week.

Mister, you next book needs to be a compliation of snarky gay civil rights stuff. You rock.
Anonymous said…
"I'm sure in the Bible it says that young women should not flash their surgery enhanced ta-tas for monetary gain or thou shalt go straight to hell."

Appealing to the Bible, which you obviously have low view, of to trash a believer makes you the hypocrite. Oh by the way, the Bible does not say one goes to hell if as a believer one stumbles into sin once. Nope, can't find that anywhere. Or otherwise, everyone in the Bible, except Jesus, would end up being going to hell. One goes to hell for all sins, if one remains in unbelief in Christ, according to the Bible. The very idea of being a Christian presumes one is a sinner in need of Christ in the first place. Nowhere does it state one stops being a sinner the moment one believes, just that one is fully forgiven by God.

Yes, she might have a questionable past. But gues what? How many of us make choices we regret in the past? Should that keep us today from standing up for what we believe? Charges of hypocrisy can also go back to those playing that right now.

"Prejean's response: "I'm a Christian and a model." Uh-huh. What you really are Carrie Prejean is an opportunist, a bigot, a hypocrite and a fucking liar."

Self-descriptive. Your faux outrage of her pictures is amusing given that she showed more skin at the pageant than in the picture released so far. An opportunist? Opportunist to get hounded for weeks by Hilton and his band of media thugs and having to responding each time to them? Bigot? For expressing the same views as Obama, except Obama brought his faith in his answer, and she did not at the pageant. Hypocrite? Real Christians admit they are still sinful and imperfect and real Christians preach against sin, because despite their sinfulness, just like the adulterer/murderer David or the ex-murderer of Christians, Paul, God was pleased to use those flawed folks to spread His word. Take your hypocrisy charges up with God and the Bible.

"Expect the National Ogres For Marriage to run like hell from Carrie and for her to be stripped of her Miss California title."

Self-delusion on the first part, and who cares on the second part.

You really do not understand Christians. All you prove is that she is a sinner. And that is a shocker to Christians who already know all of us are sinners including themselves? And shocker that believers had blemished past?

"I'm sure Hustler and Juggs will be calling Carrie soon. If you want to see Carrie's dirty pillows (hat tip to Margaret White, who would have sent this Carrie straight to the prayer closet) you can see them at The Dirty.com blog."

Like I said, faux outrage.
Collin Kelley said…
I have a low view of people who call themselves Christians but act like anything but. They twist the words of the Bible into hate and use them to try and deny others their human and civil right. If that's the kind of Christian you are, you really should reexamine what it means to be a Christian.

So you don't care that Prejean lied on her contract with Miss USA that she'd never had nude or semi-nude photos taken of herself? I guess that's okay because she's a "believer." And now she's become the pin-up girl of a right-wing organization that spread lies and fear on national television. I guess that's okay, too, because she's a BELIEVER. Give me a fuckin' break. I also love how you selectively defend Prejean, but have nothing to say about your fellow "Christians'" Marion Barry and Joe the Plumber. What...not sexy enough for you? Maybe defending their statements might show you up as right-wing crazy, perhaps?

I also have a low view of of people who comment on my blog anonymously, so if your moral convictions are so strong, you'll have the balls to sign your name. Put your name where your mouth is.
Peter said…
Great post. Great exchange of views. Right on, Collin!

PS: Your Idol recaps are the best.
Anonymous said…
As a resident of California I don't want Carrie Prejean representing me. She's a clueless pawn of the Christian right fringe. Didn't she say those titty shots were taken when she was 17? Isn't that illegal? Yeah, she's a winner alright. The religious right can have her.

GAV
Radish King said…
Ah, Collin, first time I've smiled all week. As for Paula, I tuned in to AI just to see if she'd fall down because I heard she was going to dance. Dang it.
xo

ps. I love it when you bring out the crazies. Including me. Jesus wants you for a sunbeam.
Anonymous said…
Well, you all knew this was gonna happen. Think about it - for one Carrie Prejean is pretty dang hot to begin with. I guess that is why she is “Miss California”. But if there are nude and topless pics like these 6 out there to be seen of a hot girl like this - you KNOW they are going to come out. Its a given. But can you blame people for not wanting to look. Oh, and the whole she is 17 thing - just an attempt to stop the spread of these pics but other interested parties. There are also rumors that these photos were originally leaked by Prejean herself. Yeah she may lose the crown but that will be nothing compared to the opportunities that are coming her way from this huge publicity spike (ala Vanessa Williams). Anyway - back to the 6 Prejean pics -

http://watercooler.jlaforums.com

I mean look at these pics - she is smokin!
Karen Head said…
"No, darling, we use your crazy ass as a punchline."

OK, that's just one of the funniest lines ever!

As for the seriousness of the issue, if all these folks are so worried about protecting marriage, then I'm in the camp that supports "One Marriage to The Adult of Your Choice" unless domestic abuse is the issue. Since over 50% of marriages end in divorce (many for trivial reasons that stem from the poor, and often hasty, decision to get married, then let's really PROTECT marriage. And since only heterosexuals can marry, it damn sure ain't the homosexuals who are destroying marriage. Faulty logic and manipulative rhetoric really annoys me.
Rachel Mallino said…
LMAO COLLIN!! I love you when you get all rantarific. "crack is whack" HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOVE THIS POST, Collin.Give it to the crazy-people!
Great idea from Kate Evans, Coll, for your next book--how about "Rant-a-riffic" or "Rantalicious" or "Snarkalicious" as the title?
That's what you are, Coll--you're Snarkalicious!!
Jacob said…
Fact: the question was asked, and she answered honestly according to what she believes. She exercised her right to speak according to her upbringing and beleifs and in this country she should not be afraid to do just that.
She should be praised for standing up and expressing those beleifs. She has been crucified publicly for stating those beliefs.
I have no problem with homosexuals, but when someone expresses an opinion different than your own it shows what kind of person you are if you attack them for speaking up. Anyway, the name calling is really juvenile and innapropriate.
Emily A. Benton said…
I'm just glad you're now writing about ta-tas, Collin ;)

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