Organizing your writing life

AMERICAN IDOL GOES COUNTRY: After the un-ending sadness in the wake of the Virginia Tech shootings, I was anticipating American Idol tonight more than ever. It's a distraction if nothing else. Country hitmaker Martina McBride was the mentor and she loved everybody, whether they sucked or not. She's on tour and needs to sell a few more tickets.

Phil Stacey - Possibly Phil's finest moment on the show. He sang "Where The Black Top Meets the Road" and it was definitely his best vocal. Martina said he was a little stiff, but what can you expect from Nosferatu the vampire? Whether it's enough to keep him in the competition is the question.

Jordin Sparks - She decided to sing Martina's "A Broken Wing" and delivered a bravura vocal. I don't like the song very much, but she totally nailed it. Too bad about that Cleopatra table cloth she was wearing. The stylist should be shot. Simon said the performance was good enough to win American Idol. We're doing a pool at work and I've picked Jordin as the winner.

Sanjaya Malakar - Sporting a red bandanna and looking seriously cute, Sanajaya was savvy and picked Bonnie Raitt's "Let's Give 'Em Something To Talk About." A brilliant song choice just for the title alone. I thought he projected his voice well, but his pitch was all over the place. Maybe if he'd stopped walking around and just stood there and sang the song (like he did last week) his voice might not have been so ragged. Randy and Simon savaged him for being too karaoke, while Paula made some comment about how Sanjaya "thrives on adversity." Let's be honest: Sanjaya keeps the show interesting, but he's nearing the end of the road. He's not going to win, and I sense his departure. If not this week, then next. I'll be voting for him anyway.

Lakisha Jones - She thought singing Carrie Underwood's "Jesus Take The Wheel" was a good idea because it resonated with all her struggles. Well, Jesus took the wheel all right and drove Miss Kiki right into a ditch. She screamed the song and sounded like she was struggling to hit some unnecessary higher notes. Her worst vocal of the entire season. Simon told her to pick better songs. Amen.

Chris Richardson - I hope he's ready for the bottom two tomorrow night. He sang Rascal Flatt's corny "Mayberry" through his nose. The band -- replete with banjos and fiddle -- were overwhelming him and he seemed to be slightly behind the melody. When Simon criticized him for being too nasally, Chris got attitude and said he meant to sing it that way, then suddenly sent out condolences to those at Virginia Tech. It was awkward, weird and had a whiff of "pity vote." He needs to go home. Give Sanjaya one more week.

Melinda Doolittle - Mindy Doo was sassy and fun tonight singing "Trouble Is A Woman." Loved her new hair, loved her outfit and she totally nailed the song. Simon told her to lose the "aww shucks" routine and she complied. It's gonna be her and Jordin in the final two.

Blake Lewis - I hate him more than ever after destroying the beautiful "When The Stars Go Blue." This song was written by Ryan Adams and originally done by Irish band The Corrs with Bono. It was later butchered by Tim McGraw, and Blake ruined it even more. This is a lilting, wistful song and Blake's bizarre accent, pitchy vocal and the shitty arrangement killed the song. Randy and Paula were practically sucking on his smug dick, while Simon called it "okay." No, it wasn't okay...it sucked hardcore. Just to get the bad taste out of my mouth, here's The Corrs' version.