American Idol 7 - One Less Cook In The Kitchen

Kristy Lee Cook, finally, rode off into the sunset -- although not on the horse she sold to get to auditions. Apparently, the guy won't sell it back to her. Boo-fuckin-hoo.

With that out of the way, let's talk about the scent of death hanging over the entire show. From Paula Abdul wearing a funeral wreath around her neck and the group sing of One Sweet Day to Elliot Yamin's dead mom (his goodbye written on his palm -- of course) to Mariah Carey's new single about her dead grandma, Bye-Bye. I actually felt sorry for David Cook, who's terminally ill brother was in the audience last night (although I still think his cover of Always Be My Baby was a hot mess).

The group sing was, as usual, a mess. Jason "Janice Muppet" Castro looked stoned (natch) and his falsetto failed him, David Archuleta was wearing another one of those Members Only-looking leather jackets and the end of the song -- with different pairs trying to sing different verses at the same time -- was an epic arrangement disaster.

Then Miss Ryan (via the producers) started the mind games of who was going into the bottom three. He called out Jason, Carly and Syesha and put them all on the left side of the stage and then David Cook, Kristy Lee and Brooke were put on the right. That left Little David back stage to worry (yeah, right) about his fate while Yamin and Carey did their songs and they took more calls from viewers. David Cook is single. Swoon. Not.

Mimi might have been singing about dead people, but she looked like a high class hooker. Does the woman own a dress with sleeves and that falls below her upper thigh? She shamelessly and awkwardly promoted her new album (the only reason she was there), while Randy was ribbed for taking credit for Mariah's career. Yawn.

When Little David was finally brought out and made safe, Ryan told him to pick which side of the stage was safe. That is so cruel. Instead, he sat down in the middle of the stage, while Ryan made Syesha and David Cook switch places. That revealed that Brooke, KFC and Syesha were indeed the bottom three. Carly was so excited not to be in the bottom three she almost threw Ryan across the stage, literally.

Syesha was sent to safety, while Brooke looked like she was about to sob and got angry when Simon was flippant about it being KFC's time to go. Maybe now that Kristy Lee is gone, that bad rancher man will give her that damn horse back.